So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
