yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
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