dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize
