I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
