No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
