Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
