I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
This can only be settled by a dance off.
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