told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
We have started to decorate penises.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Randomize