This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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