i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize