so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize