Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize