I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
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