they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize