when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
