She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
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