If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize