some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
