My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
