Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
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