i wish there were pregnant emoticons
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
