ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
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