don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Randomize
