Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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