I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
