i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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