I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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