i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
