I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize
