just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
