don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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