yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
