Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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