Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Randomize
