I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
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