but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize