So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
