i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Randomize
