id be glad to
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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