doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
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