I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
