Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
