That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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