Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
