I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize