I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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