Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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