we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
