Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
