You don't have asthma, your pregnant
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
